Alone again or

Memo to all lobbyists, corporate affairs people, parliamentary officers, etc. Now is not a good time to write to us to introduce yourself, tell us all about your company and offer a meeting. Yet so many of you seem to think it is.

I know why – it’s because you’ve not been able to get at us for the last month or so (and frankly for a couple of months before that we had other things on our mind). So you’ve had plenty of time to plan your parliamentary strategy. And you might think that starting a letter with “I know this is a very busy time for you…” means that we won’t feel hassled, but the truth is, we still do.

Bear this in mind. A lot of us don’t have offices, or are in the middle of moving. All of us are trying to get to grips with IPSA, setting up business bank accounts, and making sure our staff get paid this month (which is causing more than a few problems). All of us are trying to keep up to speed with what this new Government is doing: what’s been included in the deal, what’s out; what’s being cut, what’s being saved.

Most of the 233 new MPs are wondering what on earth they’ve let themselves in for. Many don’t even have staff in place yet to open the post or manage their diaries. They’ve all got maiden speeches to write, and induction courses to attend, and parliamentary procedure to familarise themselves with…. Not to mention casework which suddenly appears out of nowhere.

Plus there’s the not-so-small matter of leadership elections, Deputy Speaker elections, Select Committee chair elections, and so on, all of which involves lots of plotting earnest discussions on the future direction of the Party and who is better looking, Ed or David how we hold this Government to account.

So please, this is a plea. Leave us alone for a little while, and come back to us in a few weeks. We’ll still be here.

P.S. It also helps to know your audience. Boasting that “we run our own abbatoirs”, as one company did, doesn’t really do it for me!

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